so I go to the closet to get a new roll of tp. I take it out, unwrap it from it's plastic and go to put it on the spindel. Something falls from the center of the roll into my hand.
#$^& ^&**() !@#$%^
I drop everything and watch as a mammoth-sized roach falls to the floor. he lands on his back and sounds like a dried mesquite bean rattling around trying to right himself. No I am not positive that it was a male - but it's a pretty safe bet.
I stand there for a second frozen in disgust and fear. he flips over to his stomach and then walks around flexing his muscles.
I scream and jump around for a while and then run to get the death spray.
when i renter the room he his racing up the wall.
so ensues more screaming and jumping.
I spray him off the wall with Raid (that's how I spell relief)
He continues to run around and seak shelter from the bitter rain on what was his scarey parade.
finally he tries to climb the wall again and falls back. He then acts out a valiant death scene that would make any old western movie cowboy proud.
Dead and gone.
What is the deal with abnormally large creature encounters these days?
Why can't I run into an abnormally large marshmallow or an abnormally large carton of ice cream in my freezer. Why does it always have to be something that puts fear for my life in my body?
#$^& ^&**() !@#$%^
I drop everything and watch as a mammoth-sized roach falls to the floor. he lands on his back and sounds like a dried mesquite bean rattling around trying to right himself. No I am not positive that it was a male - but it's a pretty safe bet.
I stand there for a second frozen in disgust and fear. he flips over to his stomach and then walks around flexing his muscles.
I scream and jump around for a while and then run to get the death spray.
when i renter the room he his racing up the wall.
so ensues more screaming and jumping.
I spray him off the wall with Raid (that's how I spell relief)
He continues to run around and seak shelter from the bitter rain on what was his scarey parade.
finally he tries to climb the wall again and falls back. He then acts out a valiant death scene that would make any old western movie cowboy proud.
Dead and gone.
What is the deal with abnormally large creature encounters these days?
Why can't I run into an abnormally large marshmallow or an abnormally large carton of ice cream in my freezer. Why does it always have to be something that puts fear for my life in my body?
posted by emily harrison at 6:54 AM
2 Comments:
this one time, at church camp...
it was time to head to lunch so i slipped on my high tops and was about to head out the cabin door when i felt something squirm around under my foot. i kicked of my shoe faster than you can say, "british knights are the most underrated shoes on the planet."
i violently shook the squirming contents from the shoe and than out of pure adrenaline beat the said squirming content with said british knights.
all that to say i fear the roach.
This freaks me right out.
Post a Comment
<< Home